It was organised for a local pub close to work, just a few drinks after work on a Friday night.As I was driving I wasn't drinking but went along for t...e laugh anyway.Abigail was a girl working in the office at the time who obviously didn't go out much and had led a quite sheltered life (seemingly).She often told us about her Church and talked to us about her religion.She was very pretty in a plain sort of a way.As the night progressed she steadily got more and more drunk everyone thought it was. "Why do you come in here and get your nails painted?"I confessed, "Well, it is hard to explain, but I really enjoy thewhole process of getting them done.....I love how it looks when theyare painted........aaaaannnnnddd I am kind of obsessed with girlythings." Wow I never told anybody this stuff before.She looked at me kind of sweetly. "And what do you do after you haveyour nail painted?" Well, I usually go back to my hotel room, open a bottle of whitewine, and get dressed up." Dressed up????. “Your badge, officer, show him your f*cking BADGE!!”✧ ✧ ✧This one is from TLSBThe Lone ranger rode up to a ranch house and the rancher exclaimed, “A masked man! You must be an outlaw!” “No Sir,” replied the Lone Ranger, I only wear this mask because of the coronavirus pandemic.”✧ ✧ ✧Say thanks to NipSC4328 for this one:Don’t eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what!!A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends ... Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch.. They each stand and give me a hug, constantly asking if I’ll be alright. “I’ll be fine, nothing a little shop therapy can’t fix.”I head off to the mall, trying to shake my mother from my mind was proving to be more difficult than I’d hoped.I'd just pulled into the mall parking lot and was trying to pull myself together when my phone starts to ring. It’s daddy.“You okay Princess?"“Yeah.”“Don’t lie to me, Shawn called me and told me about your mother.”“I’ll be fine. It shouldn’t have surprised me.
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