However, I know that my element is it's opposite- FIRE. I connect with the flames of a malevolent fire; I see myself within its intense heat. I feel a... if my emotions are a wild flame of insecurities, revenge and self-hatred. It's ironic how I see myself engulfed in darkness and yet I feel as if I connect with the one thing that can bring me light.The darkest night - a blanket of onyx silk shielding us from the problems and responsibilities of the coming day...I found myself gazing up at the. The etiquette of formal dining was to take small amounts on the fork and then whilst chewing that morsel put the knife and fork down and let your hands fall to your lap. No wonder these meals went on for ages! Of course Rupert would be there and in the manner of things his bedroom would be close to mine. At one weekend I was all a quiver when I was introduced to Rupert's wife. She greeted me kindly and after dinner in the drawing room she made a point to talk with me. "Lady Adelaide, or may I. Anita cameup from behind me and put her hand on my shoulder. I pulled away from herwithout a word and stormed out the door. Once outside I took off down thestreet before the rest of them could follow.As I walked, I became acutely aware of being alone. I passed a group ofyoung men and received several suggestive comments. I quickened my pace.This was the first time I had been alone outside the house at night andit made me realize how vulnerable I was at that moment. Ahead of me Icould see the. He was a bigger man than me, and I was the intruder inhis house.My brain launched into defensive mode."Brad, about earlier, I can explain..." was all I got out, before heshushed me.I looked at him. He devoured me with his gaze."I've never felt anything like that before," he said in an almostconfessional way. "Have you?"I shook my head."I love Carol, with all my heart." Of course you do." But I've NEVER felt anything like that before."I breathed out a huge sigh. "Me neither."Then I added,.
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